Ep 256: Divorce, Business Ownership, and Wealth Protection with Kelly Lise Murray
Make sure to check out www.wealthlitigated.com
Divorce is never just emotional — it’s financial, strategic, and often incredibly complex, especially when businesses and significant assets are involved.
In this episode, Certified Financial Planner™ David Chudyk sits down with legal educator and wealth-dispute expert Kelly Lise Murray to unpack the real financial realities behind divorce. Together, they explore how assets are discovered, valued, negotiated, and divided — and why business owners must think proactively about recordkeeping, planning, and professional guidance long before a legal dispute ever begins.
Whether you’re a business owner, investor, or simply someone who wants to protect what you’ve built, this conversation provides powerful insights into how wealth decisions are made when relationships change.
🎯 What You’ll Learn
- How financial discovery works once a divorce begins
- Why business valuations can vary — and what courts actually consider
- The difference between fair market value vs. perceived value
- Common mistakes business owners make during divorce proceedings
- Why mediation can be helpful — but also risky without preparation
- How retirement accounts, inheritances, and premarital assets are treated
- The role of prenuptial agreements in protecting wealth
- Strategies business partners should consider to avoid disruption
💼 Key Topics Covered
🔎 Financial Disclosure & Asset Discovery
Divorce begins with financial affidavits and due diligence from both spouses. Hidden accounts, unclear bookkeeping, or incomplete records can dramatically increase costs and reduce credibility in court.
📊 Business Valuation in Divorce
A business is typically valued based on fair market value, and courts often rely heavily on professional experts. Personal expenses run through a business, unclear accounting, or inconsistent records can significantly impact valuation and even child support calculations.
⚖️ Mediation vs. Trial
Mediation allows couples to craft their own agreements privately — but without proper legal and financial guidance, people can unknowingly agree to uneven settlements. The judge ultimately decides if a case goes to trial, often based on credibility and documented evidence.
🧾 Separate vs. Marital Property
Premarital assets, inheritances, and business ownership interests can remain separate — but commingling funds may transform them into marital assets. Understanding these distinctions is critical to protecting wealth.
📑 Prenuptial Agreements
A well-constructed prenup can prevent years of litigation and provide clarity for blended families, business owners, and individuals with significant assets or trusts. Full disclosure and independent legal representation are key to enforceability.
🤝 Business Partners & Divorce Risk
Buy-sell agreements and thoughtful planning can help prevent a partner’s divorce from destabilizing a business. Courts typically cannot force a business sale but may offset value using other marital assets.
💡 Powerful Takeaways
- Divorce often becomes a “stress test” for bookkeeping, estate planning, and financial organization.
- Credibility matters — messy records can be interpreted as intentional wrongdoing.
- Treating divorce like a business transaction, rather than an emotional battle, often leads to better outcomes.
- Wise counsel — legal, financial, and tax — is essential when significant assets are involved.
👤 About the Guest — Kelly Lise Murray
Kelly Lise Murray is a longtime legal educator and wealth dispute resolution expert with more than 30 years of experience. She has taught judges, lawyers, and financial professionals about complex asset litigation and now focuses on helping people better understand how high-value financial disputes unfold.
🎧 Learn more about Kelly’s podcast:
Wealth Litigated — deep dives into real wealth litigation cases
🔗 Resources & Mentions
- Wealth Litigated Podcast
- Business valuation experts & financial professionals
- Mediation and dispute-resolution strategies
- Prenuptial and buy-sell agreement planning
🧠 Weekly Wealth Perspective
Business ownership is a privilege — and a responsibility. Running clean books, building strong professional relationships, and planning ahead aren’t just good practices for growth — they are critical safeguards when life takes unexpected turns.
⚠️ Important Disclaimer
This episode is for educational and informational purposes only and should not be considered legal, tax, or financial advice. Always consult with licensed professionals regarding your specific situation.
🎙️ The Weekly Wealth Podcast
Mindsets. Tactics. Strategies to help you build and maintain wealth.
00:00 - Untitled
00:02 - Exploring Divorce and Financial Aspects
07:49 - Understanding Business Valuation in Divorce Proceedings
16:51 - Understanding Mediation in Divorce Proceedings
20:40 - Understanding Mediation and Its Role in Divorce
28:00 - The Importance of Prenuptial Agreements in Business Partnerships
We have an interesting episode this week.
Speaker AWe are talking with Kelly Murray and we are talking about divorce and some of the financial aspects and talking a little bit about her podcast where she breaks down some interesting divorce cases.
Speaker AThis one will be really interesting and I hope that you enjoy this episode.
Speaker AWelcome to the weekly wealth podcast.
Speaker AI am certified financial planner David Chudick.
Speaker AI spend most of my days talking with business owners, the mass affluent and the high net worth about their money.
Speaker AWe talk about their financial dreams, we talk about their financial worries and we talk about the decisions that they know they need to make.
Speaker AThat is what this show is about this week.
Speaker AWe are talking about business ownership and we are talking about some of the divorce decisions that may need to be made and some actions for business owners who are in that process.
Speaker AWe have Kelly Murray with us today.
Speaker AShe is actually a divorce attorney in one of the most beautiful cities that, that I know of in Charleston, South Carolina.
Speaker AHey, Kelly, how are you?
Speaker BHi, David.
Speaker BI'm doing well and it is very chilly in South Carolina, but we don't have the snow that everybody else does.
Speaker AIn my neck of the woods we got some ice, but thankfully we did not lose power, which is a beautiful thing.
Speaker ALet's jump right into it and first let's give the disclaimer.
Speaker AThis is not legal advice.
Speaker AThis is general information.
Speaker AIf you have any questions, make to contact a licensed attorney in your state.
Speaker AAnd by the way, are you licensed in any states other than South Carolina?
Speaker BI'm actually not licensed in South Carolina.
Speaker BI'm licensed in Illinois.
Speaker BSo I taught at Vanderbilt law school for 18 years and retired.
Speaker BAnd while I was law faculty, I had a side project with my legal research.
Speaker BSo I've been teaching judges and lawyers and financial professionals about wealth dispute resolution.
Speaker BAnd now that I've retired from the law school, it's my main focus.
Speaker BAnd so I have an Illinois law license for over 30 years.
Speaker BAnd teaching this information in a way that, that hopefully will help people take positive steps to protect their assets is the goal.
Speaker ASo let's talk very generally once a divorce is filed and how both parties determine what the total assets are in the marriage.
Speaker ABoth maybe brokerage accounts that may be in his name or her name, maybe some IRAs, maybe businesses.
Speaker ABut like, how does the process of making an inventory the house, how does process start?
Speaker BGenerally you're required to do the minimum required by the state and that would be a financial affidavit.
Speaker BSo each spouse has a due diligence obligation.
Speaker BYou are responsible to find and value assets and find and quantify debts.
Speaker BYou can't point fingers at the other side if it's something findable by you, like a lien on your house in addition to the mortgage that's publicly recorded.
Speaker BSo you can't say my, my spouse stopped me from finding the lien because that just means you and your team didn't look for it.
Speaker BBut if it's an account in your spouse's name only, you can't go to that account, you can't go to that mortgage service, or you can't go to that 401k, you can't get that information directly.
Speaker BSo after you and your spouse file your financial disclosures, then you each get the opportunity to require in writing the production of documents and answering of questions.
Speaker BAnd so that's how it all starts.
Speaker BThat's how you see the spouse who controls the family business or controls separate accounts or individual accounts.
Speaker BThey may not necessarily be non marriage, they're just separately in that person's name.
Speaker BThey have to comply.
Speaker BOr you and your team can file a motion with the court to compel production.
Speaker BAnd that's what makes some divorces with higher net worth or contentious business and other asset valuation issues.
Speaker BThat's what those cases take longer.
Speaker BIt's that discovery process that's the milestone we're talking about right now.
Speaker BDiscoveries where you exchange financial information.
Speaker BAnd with a business, it usually starts with documents in the spouse who controls the business.
Speaker BPossession.
Speaker BThat's what the other side's asking for.
Speaker BAnd then from there what you need to do is wait and see.
Speaker BSo if you're the spouse who controls the family business, you're the one working and your other spouse is the stay at home parenting spouse.
Speaker BYou would start by complying with their requests and give them the business documents.
Speaker BAnd then if they hire a business evaluator, you need to decide whether you're going to hire a business valuation because the court is going to.
Speaker BAll of that evidence is relevant.
Speaker BBut who's the court going to give more weight to?
Speaker BA professional business valuation?
Speaker BThe other spouse.
Speaker BJust saying.
Speaker BI've looked at the records and here's.
Speaker AMy opinion and one of my services that I provide to my clients is exit planning and preparing businesses to be sold.
Speaker AAnd I can tell you a business valuation can vary greatly.
Speaker ARight.
Speaker ALike anything else, a business is only worth what a willing party is going to pay.
Speaker AAnd it can be sold as can be made to look more valuable or it can, I guess one party might have the motivation to make it look to be less valuable, correct?
Speaker BAbsolutely.
Speaker BThat's what comes up in South Carolina cases and in other states also.
Speaker BBut I was for, in preparation for today looking at South Carolina cases and what the courts, the South Carolina Supreme Court has written recently is that it's fair market value, not fair value.
Speaker BSo just because the party's experts may disagree on a discount or an add back or other aspects of valuation, the trial court decides credibility.
Speaker BThe trial court, based on the evidence, gets to determine what the valuation is.
Speaker BAnd the standard is abuse of discretion.
Speaker BThat is so hard.
Speaker BSo you want to win at the trial level because the appellate court will give a lot of deference to what the trial court did.
Speaker BYou have to really show error, meaning there was financial evidence in the record that said the numbers were lower and the trial court went with something higher that would be reversible.
Speaker BBut if it's simply this expert or that expert, the trial court gets to pick.
Speaker ASo when we are looking at a divorcing couple and we have assets, is it just so simple that you just divide everything 50, 50.
Speaker AIf there's a million dollars in a 401k, one spouse gets 500,000 of it, the other spouse keeps 500,000 of it.
Speaker AThere's another brokerage account that's worth a million dollars, you split it 50, 50, and then the business, is it that simple or does it become pretty complicated as far as how different types of assets might be treated when we're coming up with a settlement?
Speaker BIf we start with retirement assets, the question is, was any of it premarital?
Speaker BThat's the big fight there.
Speaker BSo premarital.
Speaker BIf someone started at the 401k before they got married, then what you would do is have your financial folks trace, here's the value before we got married, and then here is the marital appreciation.
Speaker BSo your spouse wouldn't get 5050 if part of it started with premarital financial interests or.
Speaker BAnd then the other, the flip side of that is let's say you get an inheritance while you're married that's separate until you do something.
Speaker BThe legal term is commingling.
Speaker BAnd the result of commingling leads to transmutation to legal terms which result in your spouse getting part of your inheritance or maybe half of it.
Speaker BBecause if you, for example, use an inheritance, put it in a joint account and then use it to pay marital expenses, pay the mortgage, pay the kids, school fees, and all those things that can become marital, if it isn't split 50, 50, your spouse could still get an interest less than 50% in the appreciation during the marriage.
Speaker BSo a separate asset like a Business if it was premarital and separate, but its value appreciated during the marriage while your other spouse was managing the household, which is viewed as an economic contribution to the marriage and giving you the time and ability to run the business, that there's a marital interest in the appreciation even in of a separate business.
Speaker ASo we're looking at a business and let's say what are some of the factors that either party's business valuation expert might use in order to come up with a value or a range of value for that business.
Speaker BIt follows business valuation for buying and selling businesses.
Speaker BThe difference is you have an adversary.
Speaker BSo hopefully in the purchasing and the selling of a business there it's an arm's length transaction.
Speaker BBut they're not looking to gotcha.
Speaker BThey expect you to be playing fair and doing it right.
Speaker BBut in divorce people have, especially with a business, they can do things that the business valuator would normally add back, for example, and so one consequence of your personal expenses being run through the business in running your business and you know, the business pays for your vehicle, the business pays for your cell phones, the business pays for a lot of things that would could be added back in a business valuation for purposes of sale.
Speaker BIt also will be imputed income to you for purposes of child support.
Speaker BSo if the business pays you less than it would and then you have all these perks, those perks get added back by the court and of course the other spouses, financial folks to determine that your income for purposes of child support is higher than what your W2 show.
Speaker BThat's just one example.
Speaker ASo as we're putting together an inventory of all of the assets, is it a done deal that businesses typically have to be sold during a divorce or can one spouse retain the business and that would just be factored as one of the assets that they're keeping as part of the settlement.
Speaker BIn a South Carolina Supreme Court decision semi recently the court pointed out that mostly businesses are not sold.
Speaker BSo that's actually a direct quote of the South Carolina Supreme Court.
Speaker BAnd that's why marketability discount should.
Speaker BSo the South Carolina Supreme Court held that a marketability discount, for example, should not be always applied or never applied.
Speaker BIt should be discretionary with the trial court.
Speaker BAnd so this was the Clark case in 2020 where the trial court applied the marketability discount.
Speaker BAnd then the, the appellate, the intermediate appellate court held, oh no, it's a bright line rule, okay, you can apply it.
Speaker BAnd then the Supreme Court said no wait, the trial court gets to decide.
Speaker BSo that's where it is in South Carolina.
Speaker BIt's discretionary with the trial court if they're going to do discounts.
Speaker BSo it could be a minority control discount, a marketability discount.
Speaker BAll of all of those things that are used to value a business for purchase or selling are are can be brought in to the court but it's just dangerous if you aren't represented by a lawyer and you don't have a certified financial professional, you don't have someone else who's testifying about your finances and your and the other spouse is bring in all of the folks has the lawyer has the CFP has all of that.
Speaker BWho's the court going to rely on more?
Speaker BYou can just see how that's going to go.
Speaker BAnd I have cases in multiple states where on appeal the appellate court holds a trial court had the discretion and only one side had an expert.
Speaker BAlso though you can have experts disagreeing now courts generally won't can't average two business valuations.
Speaker BThat's not mathematically or business fair market value accurate but the court can just pick a number.
Speaker BI call that picking a number.
Speaker BSo you want to make sure that you've got going into a divorce with a business it should be the same document preparation as preparing to sell your business.
Speaker BYou want to make sure all the records are can withstand scrutiny based let's.
Speaker AStep away from the podcast for just and we do very little services that I so most of conversation exit their business.
Speaker AMost of it is so as business owners you're familiar with information challenges and complexities that come with steering your company day to day.
Speaker ABut have you considered picturing your end game?
Speaker ASo imagine having a destination so clear every decision you make speak with you how would they find you?
Speaker AYou have a free ebook called the End Game go to my website www.podcast.com website endgame.
Speaker BI want them to listen to my podcast which is different from yours.
Speaker BSo my podcast is called welcome Litigated.
Speaker BThis is what I do.
Speaker ASo regardless of it's if it's divorce, if it's IRS audits, if it's selling a business it's hard but we need to have our businesses run very well so that we're not having to scramble in in cases of any of these events.
Speaker AAnd one of the reasons that I really enjoy working with business owners because business owners they carry a large burden.
Speaker ASo they're dealing with their trade right.
Speaker AA home builder first of all is building homes for their clients.
Speaker ABut they're also dealing with hr.
Speaker AThey're hiring and firing employees they're dealing with business taxes, they're dealing with business insurance, they're dealing with all of that.
Speaker AAnd then they're also dealing with their personal finances.
Speaker ASo it's very important that we keep our finances straight.
Speaker AWe keep good records.
Speaker AI think one of the worst things that most that any business owner can do is keep their own books.
Speaker ABookkeeping is something that is.
Speaker AIt may not be rocket science, but it does need to be done the right way.
Speaker AAnd you're much better off paying someone to keep your books and records straight.
Speaker AHave you seen scenarios where just bookkeeping, even by a bigger business?
Speaker ABecause I know I've dealt with some big, high multiple 7 figure revenue businesses where it was really a train wreck and they couldn't have, I would guess that they hadn't had an accurate tax return ever.
Speaker BBless their hearts.
Speaker BYes.
Speaker BAnd so just think about it.
Speaker BIn divorce, that gives the other side the ability to argue nefariousness even before they find anything.
Speaker BJust think about it.
Speaker BIf it's the business owner and it's only one of the two spouses involved in the business doing all the things and the finances running and the books and the taxes, if there's a mistake, they're going to.
Speaker BThe other side's going to paint it as intentional.
Speaker BIt could just be a math error.
Speaker BBut.
Speaker BAnd what you don't want in divorce with substantial assets, you don't want the court to view you as not credible about your business finances because then you will have no credibility for any he said, she said issue.
Speaker BAnd that generally happens.
Speaker BI have South Carolina court cases where that happened also.
Speaker BSo this was a husband who had his W2.
Speaker BOne of his W2 payments he deposited into an account in France.
Speaker BBut he had been arguing, oh, that's totally separate.
Speaker BAnd when her side was able to show no, you're depositing marital income, W2 income into that account.
Speaker BThat is, that part of that at least is marital.
Speaker BAnd he obstructed, he had evasive answers, didn't comply, didn't give the documentation, claimed not to know.
Speaker BAnd so the court had to.
Speaker BIntermediate appellate court had to remand it back to the trial court and they're still divorcing because of it.
Speaker BIt's less expensive and you can move forward with your life doing it right the first time.
Speaker BAnd the other thing I want to say about divorce, stress tests all of your business finances.
Speaker BIt also stress tests your estate planning, which are obviously linked.
Speaker BAnd so you want to make sure you're getting it right the first time because you're going to spend more money and if you lose at the trial level, you're unlikely to prevail on appeal unless there was an actual error that you have the documentation to prove.
Speaker BSo it's better in the long run to just play it straight.
Speaker BAnd it's better because at some point you do want to retire.
Speaker BAt some point you do want to reap the benefits of building up this business to the success that it is.
Speaker AAnd you mentioned experts.
Speaker AGuess what?
Speaker AEach one of these experts are getting paid, right?
Speaker AIt makes the process more expensive if, number one, maybe we're not able to agree reasonably in the beginning, and number two, if one attorney or one team is having to verify numbers that maybe are purposefully not accurate or impurposefully not accurate, everybody still is paying in that case.
Speaker AAnd the process of divorce has never been alleged to be cheap, has it?
Speaker BIt gets more expensive or less expensive, depending of your.
Speaker BDepending on your choice of dispute resolution method.
Speaker BSo everyone in this state has to start your divorce with a court and end it.
Speaker BBut you have choices in the middle.
Speaker BProperty, including the house and business can be mediated and that would be in a settlement agreement, just like you would settle if you had a business dispute with another business.
Speaker BIn divorce, though, as soon as you sign your settlement agreement, that's a binding contract that the judge can't change.
Speaker BSo you want to make sure you have all of your information early on because mediation happens early.
Speaker BPeople have low information or no information and make binding decisions about massive assets like a house with significant equity, retirement assets with significant value businesses which are complicated to value depending on the type of business.
Speaker BHow does South Carolina treat goodwill?
Speaker BThere's, you need to know how the cases come out on that because it's not treated, it's not treated the same way.
Speaker BPersonal goodwill is treated differently.
Speaker BSo you would want to have those answers before going into a mediation.
Speaker AAnd let's talk about that mediation process.
Speaker AWhat does it look like?
Speaker AWho is a mediator?
Speaker AIs that a judge?
Speaker AIs that an attorney?
Speaker AWho's paying the mediator?
Speaker AAre both parties paying the mediator?
Speaker AAnd then how might a mediator or how might that process look at different types of assets?
Speaker ASo let's say, I don't know, you have a couple, they're both 35 years old.
Speaker AAnd let's say there's a million dollar IRA.
Speaker AWell, that IRA really is.
Speaker AIt's not liquid, right?
Speaker AIf you take distributions, there's some pretty heavy tax consequences.
Speaker AAnd let's say there's another account that's just a million dollar bank account.
Speaker AWould those two items potentially be Looked at or valued or handled differently.
Speaker BIt's your job to speak up.
Speaker BHopefully through your professional team, hopefully you have a cfp, hopefully you have a lawyer.
Speaker BBut it's your job to speak up and say, this $100,000 for a 1K and this $100,000 equity we have in our beach house, they're not equal.
Speaker BThat's apples to oranges.
Speaker BBut plenty of folks can go to a mediation and I'll backtrack on what that is, but they can go without lawyers.
Speaker BYou don't have to have lawyers.
Speaker BAnd they look at 100,000 and say, oh, you have that and I'll keep this.
Speaker BAnd somebody got more than the other because of depreciation and tax treatment.
Speaker BSo mediation is voluntary with assets.
Speaker BThe court can make you attend mediation.
Speaker BNo one can make you agree.
Speaker BSo you have to go and you have good faith or you'll get tattled on.
Speaker BThe mediator is a neutral and you get to choose.
Speaker BThe only time the mediator has to be regulated by the state is for the court to appoint that mediator.
Speaker BBut if.
Speaker AAre they an attorney by trade or can they just be?
Speaker BCan be.
Speaker BThey can be.
Speaker BSo you have to meet the criteria in South Carolina, but only if you want to be appointed by a court.
Speaker BAnyone can hold themselves out as a mediator.
Speaker BI've taken the state supreme court mediation training for Tennessee while I was on faculty at Vanderbilt.
Speaker BSo that's why I took the Tennessee training.
Speaker BAnd I can mediate in any state because it's not licensed.
Speaker BI also am a licensed lawyer, but as a lawyer mediator, I wouldn't be your lawyer.
Speaker BThe mediator can be a retired judge, can be a lawyer, but they aren't representing either spouse in the mediation.
Speaker BThey're the neutral.
Speaker BTheir job is to help raise issues.
Speaker BWhat I worry about, because I focus on complicated assets and significantly litigated disputes, some that go all the way up to your state supreme court.
Speaker BWhat I worry about is if the mediator is not a lawyer and has no background in these complicated assets and the husband and wife choose not to bring lawyers, or they bring lawyers, but they aren't bringing in expertise at valuing that closely held business, valuing that dental practice, understanding what the difference in goodwill, for example, then you're going to have the mediator saying, okay, now let's talk about the business.
Speaker BYou think it's worth this?
Speaker BYou agree with.
Speaker BLet's divide it.
Speaker BThat could be lopsided or straight out wrong, but no one knew because they didn't bring in the professionals that they needed.
Speaker BSo that's what mediation often happens early, and it can happen with low information or no information.
Speaker BSo I've trained judges on these issues, and I've had senior judges, and that's a judge who is retired from the bench, but is available to come in if an active judge needs to take leave for any reason.
Speaker BBut senior judges in their spare time are mediators, because people have a lot of respect for a retired judge as a mediator.
Speaker BAnd one judge asked the senior judge, when you mediate these issues, judge, do you see more documents than we see at trial?
Speaker BAnd the judge said, when I mediate, I see less, fewer, and sometimes none.
Speaker BAnd we so mediation, because it's not court, there aren't rules.
Speaker BYou're simply get to bring what you bring, and then the mediator asks you whether you agree on these valuations.
Speaker BSo it's a.
Speaker BIt's a little bit of the Wild west, if you let it be.
Speaker BBut you get to decide what, how you're going to be represented at mediation.
Speaker BAnd if you have valuable assets, you absolutely need financial representation and legal representation.
Speaker ASo is the end goal of mediation for the mediator to present a scenario and then both parties agree on it?
Speaker BYes.
Speaker BIn mediation, each of you gets to be heard, you get to craft your settlement, the mediator facilitates it, and if you both agree and sign, that's a binding contract.
Speaker BThe reason why you should prepare for mediation and take it seriously is the judge.
Speaker BYou don't want to leave this all up to the judge.
Speaker BPeople think, oh, my spouse did all this and the judge will just be horrified.
Speaker BNo, the judge has seen it all.
Speaker BAnd so what you want to shock them isn't going to shock them.
Speaker BNow, South Carolina does have rules that could affect the percentage of if someone's at fault in the marriage, for example, that could have a different effect.
Speaker BBut basically, mediation is an opportunity for you to keep it private.
Speaker BMediation is private.
Speaker BOne of the cases I read, a South Carolina case, the court's pointing out the husband's name, his bank of America account, and the final four digits of it are throughout this opinion.
Speaker BI don't want to know that you don't want that kind of thing public.
Speaker BSo mediation keeps it public, but also sometimes the divorce court will make sure everybody's at least a little bit unhappy, because that feels like justice.
Speaker BYou don't want that.
Speaker BIt's better to craft.
Speaker BThese are my priorities, and I would still like that to go differently.
Speaker BBut I'm getting my priorities and you're getting your priorities.
Speaker BThe judge is not bound by your priorities and can just make the decisions based on the evidence and the credibility.
Speaker BAnd you may be worse off going to trial on certain issues now, complicated business valuations.
Speaker BThat is something a trial judge would not be surprised to go to trial.
Speaker BThat makes sense if you each have two experts who are approaching it differently based on your interest and your spouse's interest.
Speaker BBut the personal property side of it, for example, that's not something the judge wants to decide.
Speaker BWho gets the Ikea bookshelf?
Speaker BI know building it may have been traumatic, but the judge doesn't care.
Speaker BReally quick question.
Speaker BWhen's the last time you stopped to ask where is my money actually taking me?
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Speaker AIn South Carolina or most states do, do they try to make an argument, hey, my spouse is a bad mean person, so I deserve more and does that hold water or it really doesn't matter if you're a nice person or we're coming up with an agreement.
Speaker BThe issue is fault.
Speaker BAnd so in a state like South Carolina that does get so for example, South Carolina has a one year waiting period too.
Speaker BSo you file for divorce and you're not.
Speaker BYour divorce is going to be final until the waiting period expires.
Speaker BGuess who has short waiting periods?
Speaker BNevada and Florida.
Speaker BBut that's not North Carolina and that's not South Carolina.
Speaker BSo in that time that you have to be separated, you have time to get these financial issues handled.
Speaker BBut if issues that would hold up as fault, for example adultery, if that's proven to the trial judge, then that may affect your eligibility for alimony, for example.
Speaker BSo there's a South Carolina case where the wife was the was a high earner, she worked on a business and the issue was what percent was marital, what would the husband get?
Speaker BBut because of her adultery, there was no alimony for her.
Speaker BSo the statutes in state, in all states, including South Carolina, identify the factors for the judge to consider.
Speaker BBut if fault is a factor, it can eliminate someone's eligibility for alimony, for example.
Speaker BSo those are the only ones that work.
Speaker BThe judge has seen it all and that's where mediation is really helpful because if you get a chance to be heard.
Speaker BBut we need to treat this, especially the division of significant assets, as a business transaction.
Speaker BYou are business partners divesting.
Speaker BAnd if you treat it that way, you will be better off because emotion does cloud those financial decisions, doesn't it?
Speaker AOh, and that's one of the biggest reasons in the world work with a financial advisor on anything, is because we tend to make emotional decisions.
Speaker AThere are times when the stock markets are going down slightly and people say, I watched my favorite news channel, they said, the depression is coming, let's go to all cash.
Speaker AAnd then by the end of the week after that, the account is higher than it was and they sold out.
Speaker ASo we all, I think, tend to make not the greatest decisions on our own, which is why wise counsel is important.
Speaker BThe other issue is just on that is if you make a bad investment earn, you know that's not held against you.
Speaker BBut if you are manipulating assets, manipulating your business valuation picture, that is held against you.
Speaker BSo you don't have to be perfect.
Speaker BBut things like gambling and dissipating marital assets to pay, to pay gambling debts and that kind of thing, embezzling, all that's definitely going to hurt in the ultimate result in a divorce.
Speaker ABefore the trial, let's spend just a moment or two and let's talk about the very basics of prenuptial agreements.
Speaker AWhat they are, what they might prevent, what they might not prevent, and just some of the thinking points on why someone might want to consider a prenuptial.
Speaker BA prenuptial agreement is a contract and if you follow the rules, it will be enforced.
Speaker BWhat the other side would do in a divorce is try and attack the prenuptial, saying that there was not full disclosure.
Speaker BThat's one of the ways.
Speaker BSo if you have full financial disclosure, that's one of the ways that it will be affirmed or it will be.
Speaker BIt will hold up in your divorce, for example.
Speaker BSo full disclosure of your finances, both parties need to have separate legal representation.
Speaker BThat's another way.
Speaker BBut with prenuptial agreements, in order for a contract to be legally enforceable, there has to be an offer that is accepted for consideration.
Speaker BThat's a legal term for something of value.
Speaker BAnd something of value could be money, but it could also be doing something or not doing something.
Speaker BAll of those legally count as consideration.
Speaker BAnd with a prenuptial agreement, the consideration or value promise is then we're going to get married.
Speaker BThe tricky thing is a post nuptial agreement because you're already married, so there has to be an exchange of value and it's not this.
Speaker BIn order for us to stay married, this is what you have to sign.
Speaker BSo a prenuptial agreement, if you have a business before marriage, if this is a second marriage and it's going to be a blended family, those are the reasons why it's a good idea.
Speaker BIf your state planning includes trusts or you are the beneficiary of a trust from two generations above you, that trust may require that you get a prenuptial or you will be disinherited entirely.
Speaker BBecause what happens when there isn't a prenuptial?
Speaker BThose trust assets could become marital.
Speaker BSo the ex, the former in law, is the one receiving money out of the trust that was intended by your grandparents for your benefit.
Speaker BSo those are all of the good reasons.
Speaker BIt's not a prenuptial agreement and you both can decide not to get married if someone's offended by it.
Speaker BBut it's good business and it's good finances to do it correctly.
Speaker BGive them full disclosure, make sure they have their own lawyer.
Speaker BThat's how it works.
Speaker BWhat you don't want is a prenuptial that you have to litigate in the divorce because that's just going to make things cost more.
Speaker AAnd what about business partners?
Speaker ALet's say that you and I are business partners and let's just put a value of on the business of $10 million.
Speaker AAnd let's say now you are getting a divorce.
Speaker AHow might that affect me as your business partner?
Speaker AAnd maybe what are some things that we as business partners could have or should have thought about to prepare for a potential divorce by either one of us?
Speaker BOne would be a buy sell agreement within the partnership itself that in the event of a forced sale, because with a third party involved, the court can't force the sale.
Speaker BSo I have cases where the parties agree to things or the court, but only within the court's control.
Speaker BSo the court only has jurisdiction over those, the spouse, the half, the partner, which is one of the spouses, and that spouse's interest.
Speaker BSo let's say the spouse is only a 20% owner.
Speaker BThat's all that would be at issue.
Speaker BThe court can't force the sale of that business.
Speaker BBut then in those instances, the court would be looking for offset.
Speaker BAnd that is just the legal term for horse trading.
Speaker BYou're not selling the business.
Speaker BHe has a 20 interest, he wants to keep it.
Speaker BSo she gets 20%, even more of the house equity.
Speaker BSo if they would have split the house equity 50 50, she will get 70% or she will get 60% because 10% of that business that would be hers is staying with him.
Speaker BSo offset is a tool.
Speaker BBut the marital estate has to have valuable assets in order to achieve it.
Speaker BIf the business is the only main asset, then that's not going to work.
Speaker BThen that's when you do things like you would do with someone, keeping the house and then buying out the other spouse.
Speaker BYou get out, you get a business loan and you pay your spouse their share of the interest so that you can keep the business and not affect the running of it or your third party partner.
Speaker AIf listening to this podcast should just reinforce to the business owners that running a business is a privilege.
Speaker AOwning a business is hard and owning a business requires counsel.
Speaker AAnd it is so much more.
Speaker AKelly.
Speaker AI know even there are attorneys in my town and the difference between understanding the law and the ability to run a legal practice, those are two different skills, right?
Speaker BAbsolutely.
Speaker BThey are totally different.
Speaker BThey don't.
Speaker AIn law school, lots of doctors are great at surgery, but if you're running a surgery office that has 15 employees, that's a different skill.
Speaker ALegal counsel is very important.
Speaker AI've seen it before where partners don't have valid agreements, they don't have substantial agreements.
Speaker AHandshake deals are great until they're not, right?
Speaker ASo we need to be working with professionals as our businesses grow, because businesses can be worth a lot of money.
Speaker AAnd one of the things that I work with my clients is building the value of their business because typically it is the business owner's biggest asset.
Speaker ABusiness owners might be concerned that their IRA went down a little bit because maybe Microsoft stock went down in price.
Speaker AAnd yes, that can happen, but the asset that we have much, much more control over is our business.
Speaker AFor anybody who's listening and they're thinking, what this is pretty interesting or I'd like to learn more about this.
Speaker ATell us about your podcast and where the listeners can find it.
Speaker BI have a podcast, it's called Wealth Litigated.
Speaker BSo you can go to wealth litigated.com we are a video first podcast and so we're on YouTube and then we're on Apple and all of the other podcast providers.
Speaker BAnd there I deep dive on one case.
Speaker BBusinesses, trusts.
Speaker BSo estate planning, basically all the drama of true crime without the blood.
Speaker BBecause things get pretty dramatic when people litigate valuable assets, so to speak.
Speaker BSo that's what we cover.
Speaker BAnd if you're just interested in how did that work, some of it's just absolutely shocking to invite you to go to wealth litigated.com if you just want to listen to an interesting story and be happy it didn't happen to you.
Speaker AAnd this is aimed at just regular people, not necessarily attorneys or divorce judges or anything like that.
Speaker ACorrect.
Speaker BWhat I'm doing is bringing actually litigated cases.
Speaker BIt's fine for someone in locally to say this happened in my law practice and this happened in my financial practice, but you don't know, we don't know the real answer and how it will litigate until you look at how it litigated for other people.
Speaker BSo this is what lawyers use when they're filing a brief on your behalf or in opposition to you.
Speaker BI'm taking these really interesting cases and showing you some of the intricacies of Was there evidence sufficient or did one side just not bring any evidence?
Speaker ASo let's make sure that we are getting wise counsel with our businesses.
Speaker ALet's make sure that we're running our businesses well to prepare for the IRS audits, to prepare for when there potentially could be a divorce scenario.
Speaker AWe need to be ready for these things when they happen.
Speaker AAnd let's make sure that we're doing all the right things.
Speaker ABut we are the weekly wealth podcast and we talk about the mindsets, the tactics, and the strategies that help you to build wealth.
Speaker AKelly Murray, tell me what your definition of wealth is.
Speaker AWhat does wealth mean to you, your family, and the people in your life that you love and care about?
Speaker BSince we're on the topic of businesses, I would say a business that you're proud of, meaning you found your purpose and you're building that business.
Speaker BBecause more is more for everyone.
Speaker BEven if the business owner ends up in divorce eventually, more is more for everyone.
Speaker BAnd then also though the time you're able to spend away from the business is also important in terms of wealth.
Speaker AAll right, everybody, until next episode, I wish everybody a blessed week.
Speaker AThanks, Kelly.
Speaker BThanks, David.
Speaker AThe information contained here and including but not limited to research, market value, valuations, calculations, estimates, and other material obtained from Parallel Financial and other sources are believed to be reliable.
Speaker AHowever, Parallel Financial does not warrant its accuracy or completeness.
Speaker AThe materials are provided for informational purposes only.
Speaker AIt should not be used or construed as an offer to sell or a solicitation of an offer to buy.
Speaker AAny security.
Speaker APast performance is not indicative of future results.
Speaker AHere is this week's bonus content for the episode.
Speaker AI think most of us would agree that if we can avoid divorce, it is probably the best thing for all parties involved.
Speaker ABut if we get to a point where that is not possible, make sure that we're making the right decisions.
Speaker AMake sure that we are not making overly emotional decisions, and make sure that we are retaining wise counsel.
Speaker AAll right, everybody, have a blessed week.